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Got Trauma!

The word “trauma” appears everywhere we look these days. Some people  under-rate the cause of the trauma, like it’s no big deal. This may prevent the traumitized person from seeking the help they need. If trauma is ignored, the victim may not have the opportunity to heal, because others downplay their pain.

On the other hand, some over-rate trauma, which can also keep the traumatized person from receiving the help they need, because those close to him or her may try to keep sweep it under the rug.  As a counselor, I have seen both situations.

Another issue in trauma depends on the make-up of the survivor. Some people are highly resilient, like Navy Seals. I suspect they have to have the right temperament before they are selected for the job. Their lives depend on the whole team working together, knowing their job and doing it well.

Psychologists have learned much about trauma by studying the brain. Dr. David Amen and Dr. Timothy R. Jennings have made great strides in brain research and brain health.

I, on the other hand, have learned some things about trauma in my counseling office, especially in the area of ritual abuse. Years ago I went to an American Association of Christian Counselors conference. I attended a session where a woman had been diagnosed with dissociative identity disorder (DID) or also called multiple personality disorder. She had been healed of her alters (alternate personalities) in a short time.

I had never had a client with that diagnosis, but I found it fascinating. So I sought to learn more. I attended another conference, but wondered if I was wasting money. No. Almost as soon a I got home, I realized I already had two clients with DID and another one I co-counseled. It’s hard to diagnose if you don’t know the symptoms. Also I discovered someone in my family dated a person with DID. My psychology teacher in college said we would probably never see a client with this disorder, I have found it to be more prevalent than I thought.

People with DID have experienced horrific trauma in their childhood. It causes them to create alter identities in their minds. This helps them take a break from the pain and pretend to be another person. Many of the identities are children in their minds, because they created them as children. In a sense without knowing it, the host personality pretends to be  someone else, so they won’t have to feel the pain.

People seem to come in two camps when it comes to DID, especially when the client has memories of horrible abuse. They either don’t believe it or they are afraid to learn about it. They sometimes fear the person with DID. People with dissociative identity disorder struggle with life. They may believe they are a five year old child one minute and a sacred teenager the next.

People with DID are wounded souls seeking help, but they may not know where to find it. They are not dangerous. In fact, they are some of my favorite people. As they find someone they can trust, the healing begins. But it can take years for those who have had extensive abuse to integrate their alters.

They will be able to be themselves most of the time. However, depending on the extent of their dissociation, it could take a long time for the person to heal. I have worked extensively with three people with DID and helped with several others. They present as normal people, but once they trust their counselor, they allow their alternate personalities to emerge. Often they don’t know about the alters until they come out in counseling.

My book, What Lies in the Shadows: How Truth Healed a Splintered Mind, chronicles the healing journey of a woman I call Kathy. When she came to me for counseling, she already suspecting she had alters, but didn’t know she had about seventy personalities. As we began the counseling process, she remembered times when her mother taking her to a satanic cults to be ritually abused. She was a small child. Her child alters acted out the experiences on my office floor.

There are several other good books about people with DID, but this one is different. Kathy gave me all her amazing journals, where she and her alters drew pictures and wrote to each other and to Jesus. One by one, she wrote the stories of the child alters as if they were still there. Kathy gave me permission to use her journals to write exactly what she rememberd in my office. The words are those of Kathy and her alters just as she wrote them in her journals, so the words belong to her and the alter personalities.

What Lies in the Shadows: How Truth Healed a Splintered Mind tells her fascinating story of survival and healing. It also tells how Jesus spoke truth to her spirit to dispel the lies of the cult. What Lies in the Shadows is a true story of God’s redemption and love. I hope you will take the time to read it.

“And it shall turn to you as a testimony.” Luke 21: 8-19

In the sixties a preschool age girl repeatedly endured the horrors of ritual abuse that left her with about seventy personalities. She is now integrated. She is happily married and has adult children.

On October 12, 1972 my husband’s F-4 Phantom plane was shot down over North Vietnam. He became a number in the Hanoi Hilton. For that, I am grateful. He could have been killed, but instead he came home. Now we have two grown children and two precious grandchildren.

In October of 2016 Pastor Andrew Brunson was taken prisoner by Turkey, the country where he had lived for 23 years, preached, and raised his children. Until last week, he had no idea what the charges are. He was indicted, and his court date is April 16. The prosecutor is demanding a life sentence. The crime, Christianization.

What do these people have in common? First, they have been through a horrendous ordeal. Second, they survived to give their testimony. To be sure, Andrew’s testimony is still in progress, but he knows whatever happens, God will guide him.

Andrew’s mother posted on Facebook last night, Read Luke 12-18. So I did. I will post it here, so you won’t have to look it up.

“But before all these things, they will lay their hands on you and persecute you, delivering you up to the synagogues and prisons. You will be brought before kings and rulers for My name sake. But it will turn out for you as an occasions for testimony. Therefore settle in your hearts not to meditate beforehand on what you will answer; for I will give you a mouth and wisdom which your adversaries will not be able to contradict or resist. You will be betrayed even by parents and brothers, and relatives and friends; and they will put some of you to death. And you will be hated by all for My name sake. But not a hair on your head shall be lost. By your patience possess your soul.”

His mother added, God has heard all your prayers. But maybe God has a greater plan in this trial. He is not where he is by accident.

Let’s add to our prayers that the Holy Spirit will speak mightily through Andrew’s mouth; that JESUS WILL BE MADE KNOWN AND GOD GLORIFIED through Andrew’s testimony; that Andrew will have great peace and authority to speak the truth in love; that he will have his feet firmly planted on the rock of God’s faithfulness; and that all of us will see past this short life through eternal eyes, knowing it will be worth it all when we see Jesus. This is an unparalleled opportunity for any army of prayer warriors to join Andrew in glorifying Jesus.

She added, “Please send this out so others who feel discouraged over the turn of events will know how to pray and not give up.”

This morning I read in 2 Corinthians 1:8-11.

“For we do not want you to be ignorant brethren, of our trouble which came to us in Asia; that we were burdened beyond measure, above strength, so that we despaired, even of life. Yes, we had the sentence of death in ourselves, that we should not trust in ourselves but in God who delivered us from so great a death, and does deliver us; in whom we trust that he will still deliver us, you also helping together in prayer for us, that thanks may be given by many persons on our behalf for the gift granted to us by many.”

Hundreds, if not thousands all over the world have prayed fervently for Andrew. Many prayed for my husband. Until recently no one prayed for the little girl.

My husband gives his testimony of how God helped him through his time in Hanoi to anyone who asks. The little girl has given permission for me to write her story in a book that will come out soon. For her safety, she has not given permission for her identity to be revealed.

http://www.foxnews.com/world/2018/03/20/us-pastor-faces-35-years-in-jail-in-turkey-for-terror-links.html

Andrew’s testimony is in limbo at the moment, but soon he will have the opportunity to witness to everyone in the room where he will be tried.

Please pray for Andrew and his family.

The Worst Abuse of All

Traffickers steal the freedon of their prey. They force them to take drugs to keep their victims so addicted they don’t believe they can leave. It, in fact, is true. They can’t leave. They are prisoners of war, a war for human decency. Most victims never dreamed it would happen to them, but I’ve been told once a pimp gets a person, he won’t let go.

It’s money. It’s slave labor. It’s selfishness. It’s deplorable. Being held prisoner and forced to use their bodies in ways they never expected is deplorable. Not the person, but the situation. But they don’t know how to get out, and they sometimes become so brain-washed they think they want to stay. It sickens me that one human can do that to another.

This is not always grown women. They take little girls,teens, men and even babies.

Traffickers even abduct children.

I asked my nephew who was a policeman in a large city where the trafficking is worse. He said it’s worse from the high value suburbs to the downtown area and everywhere in between. I asked again for clarification. He repeated exactly what he said before. As we sat and talked with others, including his mother, he had never told her as much about his work before.

What can the average citizen do about trafficking? First, pray. Not only for the victims you don’t know, but also for the young girls and boys you do know. Pray for the police who have to deal with this horrible problem. Pray for the little girls who find themselves trapped and drugged, when they started to walk to a friends house. Pray for the parents who have no idea where their little girls are. Yes, traffickers grab little girls off the street and give them drugs to keep them from running. As they got hooked on drugs, they also became hooked on their abusers. Pray for people like my friend who may get a call from the police in the middle of the night and drive to the worst part of the city and rescue the girl who wants out. Then pray that she gets out and stays out.

Father, only You can heal this great land of trafficking. Please protect our children. Please watch over our police officers. Please be with those who have been trafficked and the families of those who have no idea where their family member is. Pray for the judges who have to determine what to do with the traffickers when they get arrested. Pray this will stop.

This may not be the worst abuse of all. More later.